So worth it.

Domalicious is with Master today, I am so happy for her.  I chatted online with her a while ago, she said she was happy and having lots of fun.  I hope that they will both enjoy their time together.  I wish I could be with them, but this is their time.  Domalicious said that Master was sending me some pictures to taunt me, I am so looking forward to seeing them

While this all pushes my masochistic buttons and turns me on, what I want most out of this cuckolding relationship is for Domalicious to be happy.  I love the way she lights up when I come home, and I love the way she lights up when she sees her Master, or even when she is chatting with him online.  It gives me such joy that Master is able to give her those things that I cannot and that she is able to experience so much pleasure and joy.  Master can give her many gifts that I cannot, I can give her many gifts that Master cannot, and I believe that Domalicous deserves all these gifts.

In turn Domalicious shares many gifts and her heart with both Master and I.  I have said it before and I will say it again, Master and I are very lucky men.

As for my heart, it is exclusively Domalicious'.  It belongs to her and her alone.  Master owns me, and I like and respect Master very much, but my heart belongs to Domalicious.  AlphaDomme owns me as well, Domalicious has given her partial ownership rights over me.  I love AlphaDomme, she is wonderful, but my heart belongs to Domalicious.

There was someone who commented on a blog I had posted on Men Submit who said they felt sad for me.  The blog was about Master and Domalicious' relationship, and how it made me feel in the beginning, how hard it was for me at first to share Domalicious' heart, and  how I was growing as a sub because of it.  I sure don't want anyone to feel sad for me.  The intensity of my feelings have caused me to struggle at times in the early part of this relationship, but it has caused me to grow and learn so much as well.  It has given me so much joy as I have discovered new depths of love and submission to my wife, and seen my wife make new discoveries about herself and us as well.  I feel that this relationship has been a great journey, and I am excited to continue forward.

Cuckolding is obviously not for everyone, but for a few of us it is enlightening, joyful, and fulfilling.  It is not always easy to make a journey like this.  It can be very difficult and even a bit scary to break down your emotions and really look closely at them, but for me it is worth it, oh so worth it.

some humiliation last night

Unfortunately Domalicious ended up not feeling well enough to meet Master the other evening, she was quite sad about that.  She is still recovering and has bad days and better days, but it seems she is making progress.

Master and Domalicious played with me a bit last night, and Master directed me to post about it here.  It was quite a humiliating experience, and of course having to post about it here is even more humiliating.

Domalicious had told me yesterday morning that Master had decided that they would play with me a bit in the evening.  She told me that my sissy hole would be fucked, and that I would be allowed to put pinky in Master's pussy.  Of course, even though I was very tired all day, I was very excited thinking about both those things.  I love having my ass fucked, and have been sooo missing being inside Domalicious.  By evening I was very wound up.

Domalicious and Master were chatting online, when Domalicious had me get undressed and lay on the bed beside her.  She told me to start stroking pinky, and asked me what I wanted to put in my sissy hole.  I really wanted to try this big white dildo we have, but Domalicious thought it was too soon for me to try something that big.  I ended up with the small vibrator she had used on me last time, it felt so good.  I love having my sissy hole filled, it excites me so much.  I was laying there edging pinky, with that vibrator going at full speed in my sissy hole, when Master and Domalicious decided it was time for the real humiliation to begin.

Domalicious turned on her webcam, and got it situated so that Master could see us.  I was supposed to stick pinky inside her, she wanted Master to see how pathetic I am at intercourse.  Well pinky was not being very cooperative.

I am not sure what it is, but I have a hard time getting pinky hard when Master is watching.  I get very excited, pinky will be dripping precum like crazy, but he doesn't seem to want to get hard.  Domalicious thinks he is intimidated by Master's big cock, which may be the case.  I was so excited that I was on the edge of cumming without even getting hard, that was extremely humiliating.  I could see Master laughing and shaking his head.  Domalicious even sucked on pinky a bit, something that very rarely happens, but that didn't help, I was still on the verge of cumming without being hard.  Finally she gave pinky and my balls a good hard swat, and that did the trick, he got hard.

Domalicious moved so I could enter her, and I was able to make about two feeble strokes inside her before I came with her and Master both laughing at me.  It was a very intense orgasm for me, I still had the vibrator in my sissy hole, and I was so humiliated to have Master watching.

I licked my cum out of Master's pussy, well most of it, there was some on the bed as well which she had me lick up.  It was all very humiliating, Master and Domalicious were both laughing at me, and joking about how quickly I came.

Domalicious had me put some nipple clamps on, and one of her night gowns.  She told me to go clean the vibrator and put it away.  After I had done that she had me remove the nipple clamps, and when Master excused me sent me off to bed in her nighty.  She gave me a kiss and told me that she loves her sissy.

It was all very exciting to me, and I am feeling very sub this morning even though I was allowed to cum last night.

Thank you sooo much Master for allowing me to put pinky inside your pussy, I know my performance was pathetic, but it did feel so very good to be allowed inside my wife again.  I am very grateful

I have a few marks.

Domalicious did give me a bit more whipping last night, and she was able to mark me a bit, hooray!  She was webcamming with Master, and wanted to show him her rawhide quirt and allow him to see it in action on me.  She placed me where Master could watch over the webcam.  She gave me a few good hard swats, and then asked me how hard a swat I could handle on a scale of one to ten.  I told her an eight, which she gave me.  She asked again, and I told her a nine, she gave me a nine, and Domalicious does hit hard.  It was great for me but unfortunately it hurt her shoulder a bit so that was the end of the whipping.  She did leave some nice marks though, so I am very happy about that, I hope she is as well.  Poor Domalicious though, I got a heating pad on her shoulder, and some pain killers.  She is doing better this morning, but obviously she is not quite up to whipping that hard yet.

Master and Domalicious are going to see each other tonight, I am quite excited.  I won't be allowed to be with them, but I am happy that they will have some time together at least.  Domalicious has been missing her Master.

Deeper submission.

I had a really intense experience last night at the hands of Domalicious and I am experiencing some really powerful emotions from it.

I think that I should explain first that there have been some changes in how Domalicious relates to me since she has submitted to Master.  This seems to be a result of her experiencing being a sub.  Since she is now a sub herself she has a whole new perspective on what a sub feels and goes through.  She has become more outwardly dominant towards me, or perhaps I should say more demonstrably dominant.  Things that she used to find somewhat silly and be bothered by, such as some of the D/s protocol, she is now embracing and expecting from me.  I like these changes very much, but it is definitely an adjustment for me.  I am having to sort of re-learn what she expects from me.  She has also been disciplining me more physically, which of course I love.

Last night she had me lay across the bed, she had the rawhide quirt in her hand, and I thought "alright a nice whipping will feel great right now."  She didn't say anything but just all of a sudden started whipping me very hard.  There was no warm up, she didn't say I was being punished for anything, she just started smacking that thing across my ass freaking hard.  Now it wasn't as hard as she is capable of, but it was definitely beyond my comfort level at that point.

I didn't understand why she was hitting me so hard, I thought I must have really screwed something up, and I became very upset.  I took the beating as best I could, but I started crying and trying to tell her I didn't understand.  After a bit, it seemed like forever, she asked me how many more I could take.  In my head I was thinking no more, but I just was crying and telling her I didn't understand.  She asked if I wanted twenty five, or three, or zero, or how many more I thought I could take.  I told her five more which she gave to me.

At this point the tears were really flowing and I was trying to tell her that I didn't understand.  She came down on the bed next to me and held me and told me she loved me.  She stroked me and held me and then explained that she was marking me as her property, that she wanted my bottom to carry her mark.  At that point I felt badly that I hadn't asked for more.

I have still been very emotional today, I was really confused while she was whipping me.  I was so upset thinking that I must have done something really bad to make her or Master angry enough that she would whip me like that.  Then, when I found out why she was doing it, I felt badly that I hadn't taken more.

I am still not sure what to make of this, it was just so intense.  It has made me feel very submissive today, and very needy, I can't get enough of hugging and holding Domalicious.  I am proud that I stayed there, behaved myself, and took the whipping like a good sub.  I wish I had understood from the beginning what she was doing, but that was a part of it I suppose, in a way a test of my submission to her.

Anyway, it was a very intense experience for me, the bad news is I still didn't really mark.  I do have a couple small bruises, but not what she was hoping for.  I have never bruised easily, so hopefully she will try again soon, maybe tonight, and if so I will hopefully better understand what is happening and not get so emotional and upset about it.

I am a contented sub.

Domalicious gave me a lovely time last night, after which I was able to get a decent nights sleep, this makes me a very happy sub this morning.

Domalicious gave me very nice beating last night.  She warmed me up very well, and used several different implements on me.  I am not at all sure what she used, I know she used a dressage whip, my belt, her hand, there were some other things as well, but I am not sure what.  I was just laying with my face down enjoying things, trying not to squirm too much, and trying to be somewhat quiet so I didn't see what else was used.  It was truly lovely and something I was really in need of.

After the beating she used a dildo on my sissy hole.  That was sooo nice, and something she has not done before.  I am not new to having my sissy hole fucked.  That was a big part of my training with the woman I belonged to before I met Domalicious, but it has been over ten years since I had been fucked, I missed it.  It felt so good.  I am obviously out of training though, I thought she was using a fairly large dildo, but afterward I saw it it was one of the smallest we have.  I was a bit surprised that it had made me feel so full, since at one time I was able to take a fist in my behind.

When Domalicious was done playing with me I was allowed to stimulate and finger Master's pussy.  So nice...I so love making my wife feel good and after all the play she had given me it was even more special.

When all the play was done Domalicious sent me to the other room to sleep and I was able to sleep a good six hours.  Sleep has been a bit hard to come by around here lately so that was a special treat as well.

Thank you Miss for everything last night, I am very grateful; and I am a very contented sub.

Happy St Patrick's Day!

I finally managed to get some rest last night!!!  It is so nice, I am still not truly rested, but am so much better than I have been the past week or two.  Domalicious is recovering, still has quite a bit of pain, but we have hope now.

As I mentioned in my last post I am no longer allowed intercourse with Domalicious, I am finding that this is an  interesting situation.  I want so much to be able to put pinky inside her, to feel her around me, to be one with her in that way.  I miss that very much.  However it also brings out feelings in me that I love.

I feel so deeply submitted to Master and Domalicious.  Knowing that her pussy belongs to him, and that I am not allowed inside it anymore makes me feel so owned.  It is incredibly erotic in a way.  I am also getting to do some lovely oral worship, and that is just so fantastic.  I have always loved to worship her pussy and now it is even more erotic for me knowing that it is Master's pussy and that his big cock has been inside it, and will be again, is so exciting to me.  I am so looking forward to seeing him fuck his pussy again and I hope that I will be allowed to lick his cum from it once more.

While I still feel jealous at times I am managing it much better.  The jealousy seems to be a good thing now, it is exciting in its own way, and I think it helps keep me more aware of just how lucky I am to be Domalicious' husband and sub.  The jealousy still hurts somewhat, but it is not like it was a few weeks ago when I was afraid that Master might take over Domalicious' heart and that she might not love me as much anymore.  Now I am feeling more comfortable that even though she loves Master there is always a special place in her heart for me.  He is her Master and her real man, but I will always be her subhub.

Busy week.

It has been a very busy week, and I am exhausted so I am just going to write a short update here.

Master and Domalicious were able to spend a few hours together this past week.

Domalicious went into the hospital a few days for a surgery that went well.  She is home now and on the mend, I am doing the best I can to take care of her.  I've not managed much sleep the past 4-5 days, and been stressed of course with her in the hospital.  Hopefully I will be able to get some rest at some point and I can catch up here a little better.

Master has decided that I am not allowed any form of intercourse with Domalicious now.  I am allowed to pleasure her orally, but pinky is not allowed inside her.  This is sad and exciting to me at the same time, I think it will be difficult for me over time.

Domalicious is considering having pinky pierced, a prince albert, with a lock placed through the piercing.  She seems to be very serious about this, so we will see, I am excited and nervous about it at the same time.

Sorry for the rather dry update, but exhaustion is taking it's toll, so I will stop here.

Keeping busy.

This week has been a very busy one so far.  Mostly I have been busy at work unfortunately, I wish I could have been more busy serving Master and Domalicious.  My desire to serve Master and Domalicious is just off the charts, it consumes me at times.  Master and Domalicious have not been able to see each other this week, they were hoping to do so, but my work got in the way and I was not able to drive her.  They chat a lot, and talk on the phone occasionally but it is not the same.  I know Domalicious is missing her Master.

Other than being over tired I am doing well.  I have not been experiencing any jealousy to speak of, and have just been really happy that I belong to Master and Domallicious.  Domalicious has been really good to me this week.  She has let me wear my collar to bed twice so far, that is a treat for me.  I love to wear my collar and hope that someday soon I will have a less obvious collar that I can wear 24/7.

Domalicious surprised me last night by telling me that she is considering having pinky pierced, a prince albert piercing I believe, and placing a lock through it as a chastity device.  That is very exciting to me, I would love to be locked like that.

I am finding that I am wanting more and more to be marked in some way as her, and Master's, sub.  I think that it is partly because she belongs to Master now and I want a physical, tangible reminder that I am still her's.  There are some other reasons as well, Domalicious is facing a health challenge, I am sure that she will be fine, but there is some worry for me there.  I believe those are the reasons why I so want a 24/7 collar, and why the idea of being pierced in that way is so exciting to me.  Of course, being me, the idea of having pinky locked up, and Master controlling the key and my access to my wife seems pretty hot.

Domalicious used my new paddle on me last night, that was so great.  I'm not sure if I mentioned it here or not, but Domalicious gave me a Maori war club for Valentines Day.  It is beautiful, and is a fantastic spanking implement.  I will try to post a picture of it here.  It was so nice to be paddled last night, I feel so much like I am hers when she disciplines me.

Things are going well.

Everything continues to go well with me, I am feeling more and more comfortable with Domalicious' submission to Master.  I think I am learning some things about submission, and about myself.  My submission is deepening, and I am falling further in love with my wife and owner.  My comfort level and acceptance with Master being the Alpha in this relationship is growing, I feel like this is a good fit for me as a sub.  I believe that there will be difficult times for me still, but I think I am coming to a better understanding of my jealousy and I hope that I will be able to deal with it better in the future.

I was thinking about my jealousy today, and about the difference between this relationship and the cuckolding relationships Domalicious and I have experienced in the past.  The big difference this time is the feelings that Domalicious has for Master.  None of the men that she played with in the past brought out such strong feelings in her.  There was one man she cared for, but Master is the first man she has loved.  I realized that in the past I have shared Domalicious' body with other men, but this time I am sharing her heart as well.  I have found that sharing her heart is much more difficult for me than sharing her body, but the past few days I have begun to really embrace this part of her relationship with Master.  It makes me happy that Master can be for her what I cannot, and that she can experience this depth of feeling and emotion with him.

As I have come to embrace the feelings that Domalicious has for Master my submission to, and desire for, her has grown incredibly.  We seem to be growing closer and closer.  As my submission grows so does my vulnerability, and I am finding that I like that feeling.  I feel like Domalicious holds my very being in her hand. My body, my mind, my heart, all of me is hers.  I wish to be in her presence every minute of every day, and when I am I wish to be naked, not just my body, but my heart as well.

I suppose that what I have written above may seem strange to most people, but the intensity of my feelings of submission to my wife are almost overwhelming, and I just don't know how else to describe it.

Along with Domalicious' and Master's relationship, and the emotions that it has brought forth in me, is a need for reassurance from Domalicious.  I suppose that I should not need so much reassurance, but I do.  I need to be close to Domalicious, I love to just touch her, rub her back or feet, or to just sit holding her and smell her hair or skin.  I have also been feeling the need to have something tangible to remind me of her, and her ownership of me, when I cannot be with her.  We have discussed in the past coming up with something, perhaps a necklace that I can wear as a collar.  I think that she is going to give me something like that soon and I am very excited about it.

The gifts of life.

The past couple of days have gone pretty well for me.  I have had a few jealous moments, and I have been a bit sensitive about my status a time or two, but all in all I am feeling very good about things.  This is an incredible experience, and I am truly glad to be a part of it.  I cannot really find words to express how this all makes me feel, but I would not want it any other way.

As a masochistic sub I am absolutely in heaven.  This experience seems to be deepening my submission in a profound way.  Perhaps with time I will be able to better express what I am feeling.  I live and breathe Domalicious right now.  She is my reason for being.  It is so hard for me to be away from her right now, not all due to her relationship with Master, but that is certainly a big part of it.  When I am home I just want to be with her, and I mean with her.  I want to be touching her, or as near her as I can be.  I love my work, and enjoy going out and doing other things, but honestly right now I would much rather be with her every minute of every day.  I have been afraid that I may be getting too clingy for her, but she has assured me that I am not, and that she is enjoying the level of attention I am giving her.

The jealousy and sensitivity I experience at times can be really hard to deal with.  I am finding this arises mostly when I am tired and/or stressed.  I get a bit fragile then and things that wouldn't bother me at other times can really hurt me.  I am beginning to believe though that even this occasional emotional pain is good in its own way.  I am finding that I have a love/hate relationship with this pain just as I do with the pain of a whip or cane.  There are times when I just feel like crying, and I am not a crying kind of guy.  Somehow though I think that this pain is not all bad.  Again this is all so new to me and I really can't express how it makes me feel yet.

I do believe that this emotional pain is going to be a part of a cuckolding relationship such as the one we are currently engaged in, and I would definitely not recommend that such a relationship be entered into lightly.  Domalicious and I are experienced with cuckolding, but we have definitely taken it to a new level with this current situation.I am coming to love it more and more though.

Sometimes I wonder what it is that makes me the way I am.  Why do I crave this pain.  Why do I get so excited being humiliated by my wife and her Master.  Of course a big part of my enjoyment of this is knowing that Domalicious loves me so much.  The pain that she inflicts on me is inflicted with love, it is just a different way of loving from what is considered the "norm".

I love this pain as well because it is something that I can suffer for Domalicious.  It is a way for me to show her my love.  I can give this to her as a gift and as a sign of my devotion.  I love to see how happy she is with Master, and even though it may make me jealous at times it also gives great joy.

Of course most of this experience is not painful at all, instead it is erotic and incredibly hot, if you are a masochistic sub that is.  Actually I don't think I would have to be a masochistic sub to enjoy seeing how happy and fulfilled my wife is.  Master gives Domalicious much that I am not able to give her, and it makes me incredibly happy that she is able to enjoy all these gifts of life.

Last night Master and Domalicious were playing a bit on video chat over the computer and I was allowed to be in the room with Domalicious.  It was so exciting for me to see how turned on she is by Master and the joy she is finding in being his sub.  Of course when she gets so turned on it is good for me since I am the one there with her and Master is being generous in allowing her to play with me quite a bit.

She was posing for Master last night over the video chat, and they were talking, they were teasing and humiliating me as well.  They teased me about how small pinky is and how well Master is endowed.  Master made a joke, I can't remember just what it was, but something about how pinky could not even fill a thimble, which just cracked Domalicious up.  It was so hot for me to hear her laughing at his joke, and at me, like that.

Domalicous wanted to show Master her favorite spanking implement, the rawhide quirt I have mentioned before here.  She showed it to Master and then had me lay across the bed and gave me a few stripes with it.  She must have wanted to impress Master because she put a lot of energy into them, I have some pretty good marks still.  I will post the picture of the quirt again below, it is a vicious thing when Domalicious wishes it to be.

After they were done Master gave her permission for me to worship his pussy.  It was so wonderful, she used her queening stool and allowed me to worship her.  While I was worshiping she was reminding me that it is Master's pussy now, and that I had better be sure to thank Master for allowing me to worship it.

We cuddled afterward and it was such a wonderful feeling to be her sub.  I was and am so happy that I belong to her.